These tips are taken from the 70/40 Rule, a small and engaging booklet about communication sponsored by Home Instead Senior Care. Here are tips 1-3.
1. Be Assertive….There will be situations where people talk to you in ways that are inappropriate. You may be patronized, put down or abused, even by family members. Assertiveness involves figuring out what you need in a specific situation, stating that clearly and definitively so that the other person can’t fail to understand. Then don’t allow the conversation to be sidetracked onto other issues.
2….Not Aggressive. Aggressive communication includes negative personal attacks on the other person as well as insults. Even if they make you feel good, these attacks are unlikely to be helpful and will probably just reinforace someone else’s negative perception of you. When the focus becomes the other person, you’ve lost the ability to talk about what you want to talk about.
3. Be Selective. Pick your battles. In some circumstances it may be easier to walk away or go along with something. You can’t fight every battle or you’ll exhaust yourself and alienate those around you. Save the assertive behavior for the situations where it is most important; that will also make it more effective.
You can find tips 4-6 here! Or look at tips 7-10 here!